Body Image!

Recently matt an I have found ourselves watching music channels and listening to music we grew up listening to…..dont get me wrong it can be very varied.

But tonight I was sat watching the Janet Jackson all for you video tonight thinking christ….she is thin there! Then I tried to remember back to when I first saw the video and I cant recall thinking anything about her weight, just how much I loved the track. Then we had a bit of the spice girls and the same thing happened…..

Favourite Janet Jackson Song

I am really struggling to comprehend how and when my brian got turned to mush and my first thought when listening to music has gone from thinking about the music to thinking about how thay person or group looks?! 

Why is that acceptable? Who cares how small or big someone is if they have a talent so great they have managed to rack up number one singles and albums or even smashing box office records?! 

I tell you where it came from. The media. It feeds us all postive and negative crap everyday. On one page it will be telling us to embrace our natural physiche and in the other it will be a pictures of up and coming trends NONE of which are regular sized women all smaller framed ladies. Then they have the audacity to praise companies who have “real” women representing thier brands!!! 

Aaaaaahhhhh!!!


Since when has it become acceptable to judge someone on their size? Why do advertisers and designers favour the slender frame? Surely they want to appeal to all women and promote a healthy body image to all women?! 
Do not even get me started on what this attitude must be doing to younger generations. 

A while ago I made decision to try really hard not to comment or judge people on thier weight, how they dress or how they look as is none of my business if someone has put on 2 stone in 2 months BUT I will praise someone if I know they are actively trying to amend thier appearance because they are unhappy. I would love to live in a world where we build each other, praise each other and accept people for who they are not how they look. 


So I ask of you, when you next turn to someone and go to say ooh she has put on weight or what is she wearing. Dont. You dont what that person is going through or if those jeans are the next size down from the ones they were in last week.

And for gods sake do not encourage our youngsters especially our girls to focus on how they look! Congratulate them for other things. Dont teach them the only way to get compliments is by how you look and what you wear. 

So please! Next time you start to judge others on their appearance, consider how you would feel if someone said the same things about you, your sister, your mother, your aunt, your cousin or even your daughter.

Emma x

Love & Kindness

When you are sat in an a&e department in the middle of the night, strange things start to happen. Fellow relatives become friends, people to lend a friendly ear and comforting words. You become concerned by how their loved ones are doing and want regular updates.  You become known as the patients relative, but often with no name. However you will often find the medical staff will seek you out & make sure to check on you to make sure you are OK. You instantly keep an eye out for the patient in the bed opposite because they are here alone and update the nurses if something has happened out the ordinary. 

You might wonder how or why I am writing this. Well it’s currently 3 am on the morning of 4th April. I am meant to be in my bed in our lodge at Centre Parcs, but earlier in the evening my gorgeous boyfriend  (or partner as he has been referred to many times this evening) decided it would be a good idea to fall off his mountain bike. I would say that none of you know the fear you go through when you get that call from your loved one to say they have been in an accident, but in reality some of you do. My amazing cousins were fantastic, we all rallied round each other and they were great. However due to Matt’s injuries we were taken by ambulance to Bath Hospital.

He is with the resus team at the moment having his arm put back into socket but will need an operation on his fractured elbow within the next day or so, I am praying they will let us go back home for him to have it done there. 

I am just in awe of how people are dealing with such life changing events that are happening tonight. Hopefully Matt’s will be pretty minor and he will be back to normal within a couple of months. However a brother and sister I have been chatting with have travelled from London to Bath tonight for their mum as she has had a severe stroke and has a bleed on the brain. Her injuries will be life changing, but the family are holding things together so well. I just don’t think I would do the same. 

It’s now midday on Tuesday and I’m sat at Matt’s bedside. We finally got to a ward at 3 pm on Monday afternoon after 18 hrs at a&e! Matt unfortunately has broken a vertebrae in his back and has a very bad fractured elbow & arm. Luckily he doesn’t require any surgery on his back & he is going to be fitted with a back brace. However he does need surgery on his fractured elbow & arm as it’s a very bad break, the consultant this morning said that he did a really good job messing it up! We are hopeful to get a bed in a hospital closer to home, so he can be transferred down there after having the brace fitted today.

16th April
I am currently laid in MY bed with Matt at my side, he has had surgery on his arm and is enjoying being discharged from Hospital on Thursday after an 10 night stay. He will need physio to help get his arm back to full function, but his back should hopefully heal within the next 6 weeks. We had made the decision for me to leave Matt April 5th and return to work, his parents came up to be with him while I couldn’t be. Those days that I wasn’t with Matt were really emotional for me, not only was I worried about him, my bosses dog Chester, who we often looked after whilst she was away, was diagnosed with advanced cancer which was just as upsetting. It was made a more emotional week after the announcement of our close friends separating also. To say I have cried a lot of tears is an understatement. 

It was a big fight to get Matt to a hospital closer to home as they didn’t have a bed until 9th April and we couldn’t source any hospital transport, so I had to bring him back in my car. He was dosed up and we were sent on our way, arriving back home within 2 hrs and due to have his op the following day. Unfortunately due to swelling of his arm, he didn’t end up having surgery until Tuesday which ended up being the same day as Chester, I was on tender hooks all day! Thankfully his operation went well, he has ended up with a plate in his arm as well as wire and screws and will need checks regularly as well as physio. Chester’s op also went as well as expected, unfortunately it was too much for our favourite pooch and he didn’t make it through the night. My heart broke as I heard the news, not only sadness that he didn’t make it, but I knew just how much love my boss and her husband have for him and that they will be at a loss without him. 

However, Matt unfortunately took a turn for the worse on Wednesday he didn’t agree with the pain killers they were giving him and it ended up making him very ill and was definitely away with the fairies. To get texts from who you see as your strong man saying how much pain he was in & not being able to do anything is truly heartbreaking. Thankfully Hayley pulled me through and kept me strong at work and having Lee go to the hospital at visiting hours and report back to me gave me peace of mind whilst I finished my day at work. Luckily when I got to the hospital he was much better and almost back to his usual self. I was overjoyed when he called me early Thursday morning to say he would be discharged!

If the events of the last couple of weeks have taught me anything, it is the importance of love and kindness. We have both had support from people we least expected, Matt has received cards from people that we would never have thought! I just want to say to all of you who have taken the time to check on either or both of us over the last 2 weeks that we are so grateful and can never thank you enough for keeping our spirits high, especially during my most emotional moments!

Love

Emma xxx

A Life Filled With Love

Tomorrow, on 25th March 2016 2 of our most selfless friends will become Man & Wife.

I stumbled across this quote recently and as soon as I read it, I realised that I connected with it so much, because it reminds me not only of you both, but also the love and hopes we have for you both!

We cant wait to spend your special day with you and watch your journey as husband and wife unfold and see what the world has in store for you both! 
Wishing all the Love & Happiness in the world!
Emma & Matt xxxx

BE KIND

Just to make my head a bit clearer, I googled the definition of Selfish today….

Selfish: (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for other people; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure

You may think that it is bit odd considering I am 25 year old woman, however I wanted to be clear in my mind that I can actually be quite selfish at times. Don’t get me wrong, I will bend over backwards to help some people BUT over the years I have learnt when it is appropriate to say NO and to actually put myself first (it wasn’t an easy lesson). I don’t consider putting myself first to be selfish, which I know some will disagree, but if I was to constantly put others first when would I actually get to do things for me? Surely you would end up resenting everyone and people will take you for granted and expect you to be there 24/7 and to drop everything just for them? Does that not make them selfish for not taking you into consideration? Therefore is saying NO every now and again actually an Unselfish act?

I defiantly know a few people that need to learn to be more selfish and say no and think about themselves but on the other scale, I know people that need to say YES more and stop being selfish!

You are probably thinking ‘she has officially lost it’! I wouldn’t blame you, as writing this I think I may have! However, speaking with Matt over the weekend about our Vegas Trip next year (to cross of MY list)it turns out he actually wants to do incorporate an adventure and we are going to work in something extra so he can cross off something’s from his “list”. Selfishly, I never even took his list into consideration and just assumed he would come to Vegas with Me and our friends to do something for me. This got the wheels in my head turning, he so desperately wants to travel Asia/Australia area and we did discuss me going with him and leaving my job. However, we realised that would be a silly move and that as I wasn’t really wanting to see those places I wouldn’t go. Sat in the office today, I realised how SELFISH I have been in completely dismissing his dreams and ambitions and just greedily assumed he would be there to do everything with me, but I wouldn’t show any support in return? Which is totally unfair.

So I told Matt that next year I will go to Indiana with my family for 2 weeks and then we will go on holiday for 2 weeks to cross something off HIS list and I will for once do something for HIM.

I have always said that I am not sure what me and Matt have in common and that I believe the only reason our relationship works and has lasted so long is that we only see each other 2-3 times a week and we try to make the most of all the time we have together. Having a relationship like that isn’t easy, however, if anything it has allowed us both to remain individuals and still have our own lives, dreams and ambitions but also have the luxury that we have someone that we love to report back to and share some fantastic experiences with.

So, I ask that if you recognise yourself in this blog post, either to be someone that takes others for granted OR if you are the person that never says NO. Try and change it up a bit, you never know you might end up being appreciated a bit more by those around you!

As one of my fellow blogger always preaches….BE KIND.

Love

Emma xx